5/3

It's the end of the busiest week this semester. Week 9, I will remember you!
Something tells me though, that the weeks to come... probably gonna be as bad, if not worse! Sigh. SMU.
Glad the hell is over this week, and that my skin seems to be improving. I remember how bad it was in week 8. I really didn't even want to step out of the house. Freaking ugly. Thank God for Clinique. Really works! My mum bought this range from the airport on her way back after her trip to Qatar. She also bought me the Armani Exchange tank with embellished straps.




Seriously, self-esteem really plummets when my acne acts up :(


Things I did this week:
1) Muay Thai training
No, nothing will get in the way of me and my Muay Thai. It's the only thing I look forward to in school. Damn it, it's the only thing that gives me a life in SMU. I would lose my sanity without it!
Oh, and I seriously CANNOT do with less than 4 days of exercise per week. I start feeling so shitty.
I gotta figure out how to use the 10kg worth of weight plates. I only have 2 dumbbells, which I hate. I think I much prefer barbells. Just feels like I can do so much more with them. Hmm.. There's something about lifting.
Should I join SMUDB? It's so tempting sometimes. But my mum would kill me, cos I'd get soooo tanned!

2) Drafts, drafts and more drafts.
It's not the deadline, not yet at least. All of my presentations and reports and due week 11 and 12. But of course, there are meetings, and I'm being as responsible a member as I can. BGS and FA will be taking up a lot of my time in the next couple of weeks. Hell. I could go to my meetings unprepared, no one is going to say much. I was hell busy and stressed through week 8, and had assignments due on the first day of week 9, which left me with little time to work on my reports for BGS and FA. I had both these meetings on the Thursday, and on Wednesday, I hadn't started on anything. BUT, proud of myself. At least I completed a decent amount.
I think my FA group is a little screwed up. I find myself taking most of the initiative to organise everything. We haven't even had a meeting with full attendance yet! It's worrying :/ I'm enjoying FA. So I hope they won't negatively affect my grades. And I've gotta work so hard on FA. My midterms weren't so great. I heard from the last batch of FA students that FA finals is a killer :/

3) Project Sunshine
In a month and a half time, I will be off to Laos for my OCSP. So everything is in overdrive now. I've got to settle the tshirts and banner by week 12 so I won't be so busy when the exams start. Have been emailing and meeting the supplier the entire week. I hope the tshirt comes out nicely!
Apparently, they also assigned me as "executive chef" of the house. Great. Cooking chicken curry for 20 people. It's gonna be a first time for me!

4) SMU Open House 2011
I went down to raise the awareness of sports in SMU under SSU today. Met my OG kid, he had questions for me. I guess people are worried about not getting into the courses they apply for. So was I. I mean, with my grades, I don't think I could have gotten in just by merit alone. Thank the heavens for SMU's interviews! NUS didn't accept me, NTU and SMU did. Sorry NUS, your loss. Future successful entrepreneur here :P



Been so sleep deprived the past week. I really want my double eyelid back ):

Oh, and I got fucking scammed by some woman online. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!
She scammed this girl as well. Read her story: http://community.livejournal.com/sgflea/134175721.html
I seriously want to report her to the police la. She is a serial scammer! And she's been doing it for years to so many girls! Like WTF.
I really don't care if I don't get my stuff back, I just want her to change her ways, and if the only way she is going to do that is by reporting her to the authorities, then I'm gonna do it. I can't start to imagine how many more potential victims there will be.
I know it's my fault for not checking up her creds beforehand to see if she has been blacklisted, but... AHHHHH! Seriously, this woman is pissing me off!!!!

27/2

Today, we celebrated Amma and Tata's 50th Wedding Anniversary at Amara Hotel.
We've been talking about taking a family portrait for the longest time, and now, finally, it is done!

I am really lucky to have both my grandparents. They both really love me so much, I know, and sometimes I wish I could be with them more often, better still if I lived with them. When we were living together, I was so happy. When we had to move out, I was really upset that I had to leave them, though they are just 5 minutes away from my place. Sometimes I wonder why I don't go over more often. During my upcoming holiday, I want to make it a point to go over to their place more often, whenever I have the time. It doesn't matter that it's for no reason at all, I should be with them more often.

Mark made a video for today, featuring my aunts, their husbands, Mummy, Godpa and my cousins. Was really nice, very touching. We each recalled our fondest memories or moments with my grandparents and what was the food we loved the most that they cooked. For me, I will always remember how Tata used to love to kiss me when I was younger, and he would shave often and the tiny stubbles would use to grow out. I hated the feeling of the stubble, so he used to have to bribe me with $2 for each kiss. Of course, he still kisses me, but now I don't demand $2 anymore la. Haha!
For Amma, I remember sitting with her on her bed and she teaching me how to write those Tamil words. I could never really remember what they meant, but I didn't want to disappoint her, so I kept writing diligently. I also used to run to their room in the middle of the night to sleep between them. Usually, I slept on the floor in the living room with my maid, but sometimes I would get scared and that's when I ran to them. Ahhh, such fond memories of my childhood (:


Some photos from today:






The dress I took such pains to get. My brother looks handsome!!! Like Korean pop star :D


Best smoked duck.


A few of my relatives made speeches, and got really choked up doing so. We're all really appreciative of my grandparents. Really. Just so loving. Whenever I quarrel with my mum, they are the ones who cheer me up, and protect me. When I'm sick, they come and visit me and bring me sick-people food. I guess what they say is true. In Western culture, love is shown by parents by hugs, kisses and lovey dovey words. For us Asians, love is shown through food. That's why parents often ask us after a long day at school or work whether we've had our dinner. This is the thing that I will always remember from The Joy Luck Club. Really resonates for me!

Met up with my dearest for some shopping and dinner in town after the lunch at Amara. How can the day get any better right? (:
I get to spend it with all the people I love! I am such a lucky girl (:

24/2

I had rice today ):
An entire day of lousy eating. And I'm falling sick now. I feel it. Might be the MSG from the food ): Really starting to feel the sore throat ):

I never wanna eat there again. That's what they call good Indian food?! Please... I have the best Indian food almost every week. And it doesn't contain ghee, coconut milk or much oil at all.
*$^&!

Never again.

23/2

Missed Muay Thai training at Hilltop again. I really need to start training for my fight in August!
Nevertheless, worked out a little:
180 air squats
More jumping pull ups

Hoping to see some progress. I think there's some already. But my elbow's starting to get in the way again. If it doesn't get any better soon, I should really get it checked. The pain now migrates through the entire length of my arm :/

3/3 days since Monday. Monday sprints, Tuesday run and some technique work for Muay Thai. ARGH. I NEED TO TRAIN NOW.

Consultations and lots of meetings from tomorrow onwards. Better get to work!


Have fun at OBS my dear (:

21/2

It's been a long time since I've updated here. I feel like this semester is really taking its toll on me. Time is passing a little too quickly, and it doesn't leave me with much time to do my own things either. It's daunting to think that the project season hasn't even started yet. Last week was really stressful.. Midterms. More stressful than the last, since I kind of gave up on a couple of mods the last time round. Sleeping 4-5 hours a day, with trainings, assignments and midterm papers on the same day...
I think I need a break.

It's week 8 already. Fight team training is back on, which means I've gotta commit 3 days a week to Muay Thai again. I won't be fighting in March or in May, as I don't feel adequate yet, and I don't wanna get my ass kicked. I will be so tired. But it's ok. With time flying like this, it will be over soon, and I can dedicate almost my entire summer to training. I will feel so much stronger again. Totally looking forward to that!

Lots of things happening this week.
1) FA consultation and project meeting
2) BGS project meeting
3) Muay Thai board revamp
4) Trainings at Hilltop
5) Family portrait taking
6) Grandparents' 50th Wedding anniversary

All these and I've gotta squeeze in some time to go through my work. I know I can't slack off now and lose momentum again. Really.. Sometimes I just have no motivation to study..
Well, I told myself I'd try harder this semester.


Am totally emo-ing today. Sigh.
My dear boyfriend, get well soon.
I'm truly blessed to have you.
-hugs-

Loss

I feel that dull pain, and then I cry. It's not the pain. It's the thought of the many others who have known, respected and loved. If I feel this ounce of pain, I can't start to imagine how painful it must be for them. That is the reason I cry.

I want to be selfish. I want those I love to be with me all my life...
Life, is truly so fragile.


It's true. The only way to love something is to realise that it might be lost.

28/12 - 31/12

28/12
Project Sunshine had its first local CSP with Fei Yue, our beneficiary. I was assigned to house 1, warned that there were stray cats that the old lady took in. She really loves cats. She's somewhat of a hoarder, and didn't really want us to throw anything away, no matter how redundant those items seemed to us. There was a 2006 calendar that she refused to give up because there were pictures of cats. So the before and after shots of the house weren't THAT drastic. The house still looked rather cluttered.
Having fallen sick the day before, probably made worse by training, I wasn't so up to cleaning houses. Fortunately, as marketing head, I had to move about the 3 flats taking photos of the process and taking before and after shots of each place. Slack... Phew!
We returned to school for the debrief, dinner and some HTHT. The HTHT was freaking emotional. I was really stunned when I heard a couple of stories. Looks like my life's not the only one with so much family drama. I didn't say much about myself. I found it inappropriate to divulge too much, since I hardly know half of the people there. There are about 7 of my FTB mates in Project Sunshine, and I consider them my friends. But there were people I didn't even know the names of... I was so not keen on sharing "something which impacted you". I just said that I grew up in a single parent family, no father yet never feeling like I was missing something in my life because my mum's a wonderful woman who has raised my brother and I up to be very decent human beings.
After the whole HTHT thing, I received a call from my mum. It was very upsetting. Ahhhhh... Started crying and left the room. I think some saw me, my friend said I was a little flushed. Oh well... What can I do? I feel so torn because I don't want to take sides. All I know is that I love both of them, because they are family, and I don't want my relationship with either to be strained because of one stupid company! I will never make this mistake...
I had to decided to go home and not stay over in school with the rest of the Project Sunshine people. Anyway, next day there was Muay Thai camp which I had to attend.



29/12 - 30/12
Muay Thai camp! It started at 10am with training, but I got there later because I just can't train. I just nua-ed at the side with Tingyan while he took photos of everyone training. He's a good photographer... And his awesome camera sure helps!
Since training is just beside the school clinic, I decided to pop in for a "free" consultation. I really don't like the doctor :/ Got some medication for fever, flu and sore throat. The medication really made me drowsy!
After training, we headed to The Cathay for a Japanese lunch. This was our "sponsored" meal by SMU Muay Thai. Ordered lots of good stuff. Yummy. I grabbed the salmon sashimi and salmon sashimi + mango salad for myself. Some seasoned jellyfish too! Was a good meal, but everyone was so full, and we didn't manage to finish everything! Haha.

We intended to watch a movie at 5pm but returned to school since it was only 3 plus. Planned to play "block catching" at LKCSB. Haha! Failed. Everyone was just so tired from training, or too full to play. So we ended up playing Guess Who, the game that Cindy and I prepared for the camp. It's a damn fun game! :D After everyone had their turn, we all laid down for a bit. I fell asleep because I was really very drowsy from the meds. Then someone started watching a Thai comedy beside me, but I refused to move, so everyone was surrounding me watching the show while I was asleep. I didn't even care. Was KO-ed!
Off to Holland V hawker centre for dinner then a walk to Kelvin's house. Ok, I thought his house was huge. It's an old semi-detached kinda place. Just that it has 5 toilet, 3 with showers. We watched "REC", some Spanish "I Am Legend" kind of show. I think the directing is pretty good. Since it's taken in the view of a camera on someone's helmet as they hunt down some creepy girl for her blood. The ending is pretty predictable, but other than that, it's pretty good I think. I sat in the corner and they were asking me why I wasn't afraid to sit alone. Haha. Maybe if it were a ghost movie... But zombie flicks... Just so fake la. Slept in the living room with the rest of the team... Jin snores damn loudly la. Haha! I kept waking up.

At 7am, they went for a run... I went back to sleep. When they got back, Kelvin cooked up some horrendously unhealthy pancakes. I have never seen anyone put butter and maple syrup INTO the batter! I cooked myself some oatmeal. So much healthier. When I brought it to the table, some of them asked why I didn't make some for them too. I think they were quite freaked out by the pancakes. Lol. We played Guess Who again! This time I played too. I think I guessed mine pretty fast. I was Mona Lisa. When I asked whether I was fictional, they said maybe... I was thinking how mean could they be man. Haha. But once I asked whether I came from France, and they said I was in France, then I knew! :D Mona Lisa.

Got home in the afternoon and slept some more before going to Weijoe's place for his BBQ, I had to, although I was sick, because he had postponed it from the 28th to the 29th just because I had Muay Thai camp. He invited his closest friends only... I guess I should be honoured? Haha. I only knew Hann Khee, the rest were strangers. I got to know some new people... I am not a social butterfly. Anyone who knows me well enough should know that. But I had fun though. We had very interesting conversations with interesting people. Ahhh, I was damn suay la. Hann Khee and I wore the same colours and someone said "Couple dressing, how cute!". ZZZ. Please... Haha.
Mummy met Hann Khee and Weijoe cos they sent me off... Mummy says Hann Khee is not hunky. HAHAHA.


31/12
Really just wanted to nua at home the entire day. But I had to head to Bukit Timah Plaza's DBS to sign some stuff so that I can sign company papers from now on. Super tired sia... I took the bus back home, wanted to nap but the time was just not right... Sian. Medication still making me awfully drowsy. It's been 5 days and I am still sick. Not very, but still sick! Sick enough to disallow me my workouts. I've only had one training this week, which was on Monday. Argh. Feel so shitty and unphat lor, seriously...
I was really feeling very depressed this entire week with being sick and the whole company shit... Then came the fight thing. What is this?! A hat trick?! ARGH. Kelvin texted me saying that they can't find an opponent for me, no one in my weight category. The closest is Mel, but she has significantly more experience than me, plus she just got back from training in Thailand and Terence doesn't think it would be suitable to put us against each other. So what does this mean? Are you telling me I can't fight next week? ): Kelvin says it's such a pity since I trained so hard for it. You're damn right I trained so hard lor. This is seriously so f-ed up... I wanna fight. Now I am seriously considering fighting in August if they can't find me an opponent for this competition.


Baking some cookies now with Jeremy. I will probably bring some to school too. Give Hann Khee and Weijoe. They bought me some stuff from The Body Shop for Christmas. Do I stink or what? Haha. Oh wells...
School is about to start... I haven't found all my books yet. I hope this coming semester will be a better one! My whole holiday I've spent training... Ahhh depressing...
That said, I don't regret the training. It's made me much stronger. I've made wonderful friends and team mates. It's been great, really.
In fact, the whole of 2010... I don't remember being happier. There's really so much to be thankful for. I had such an experience working in Maersk, I climbed vertical ladders, ate a hell a lot of smoked salmon, made new friends and found the most wonderful guy! (: I don't resent the waking up at 4:30am.
I started school at SMU, a new start. I was glad to leave AC behind. I told myself I would enjoy school again, and I think I will. Well, more so this coming semester since I bid with my friends this time round.
I found new friends in SMU. Yup, I did. Anti-social Maddie. It's funny how my friends call me this and stuff like "no love", yet they're my friends huh... I'm not that bad. It just takes a while for me to open up and show my warmth and fuzziness.
I picked up Muay Thai. I can now officially kick ass!

Well... So many things have happened this year, both the good and the bad.
But I shall look back on 2010 with fond memories. Here's hoping for an even greater 2011 (: